Resurrection is Real!

I have decided to resurrect this blog once again. Funny how life sends us curves, and twist. Sometimes those very things prevent us from doing what is needed and what is best for our souls. We should have never gotten married. There. It’s out there. Floating around somewhere in the universe. A truth I could have told myself in a galaxy far, far, away. Or as I’ve imagined starting a book like Karen Blixen, I had a marriage, instead of “I had a farm in Africa.” For twenty five years I was a silent partner about what was happening in my marriage. For twenty five plus years daily pain and regret alongside hope and faith have been my companions. You see, the person I trusted and love more than anyone had a toxic secret that he told me he wanted to overcome. I trusted him, walked beside him, went to therapy with him, loved him. And in the end the betrayal and carnage from so many lies and deceptions ended the marriage. The walk of faith is a daily endeavor. One that takes courage, spiritual muscle, and hope. It is time to tell the story. My story as truthfully as I can. From my perspective, from my heart, from a desire to help anyone that might also be in a relationship of toxic betrayal. We were married 38 years! 38 years is a long time! Oh but let me tell you the love story. Love at first sight

does exist. But remember this is MY story, how I felt, and saw our life. I don't claim I was right, how can anyone claim to be accurate in a relationship of the heart. Isn't that the point of love? To love with all your heart, into that dangerously exciting place of blindness? I was there from the first moment I looked into those beautiful eyes. College days, the semester had not quite started and there he was. Standing beautifully in front of me. I felt like I was looking at Brad Pitt or a reincarnation of a Ralph Lauren model. And yes I did swoon, but only to myself. I held my breath while my roommate introduced us. And then I still can not believe the words that came from my mouth! College, Saturday, the prospects of meeting new people and he needed a ride to the liquor store. "I've got a car, I'll drive you". What was I thinking! Some powerful emotion took over my mind and body, and off I went on an adventure of a life time. That's all it took, those eyes, and that voice.